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Least Competent Criminal

Robert Joseph Hallick of Chattanooga, Tennessee, was arrested Feb. 11 and charged with perjury, forgery and identity theft after applying for a handgun permit using former President Barack Obama's name, according to court documents. The arrest report also said his application included a letter with a United States of America seal and U.S. Department of State letterhead, along with a $50 check, WTVC-TV reported. In November, Hallick had been denied a handgun permit under his own name due to an active warrant for his arrest in Michigan.

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Weird History

In an auction in Chesapeake City, Maryland, that closed on Feb. 8, a white wooden toilet seat pilfered from Adolf Hitler's retreat in the Bavarian Alps sold for about $18,750, The Sun reported. Ragnvald C. Borch, a U.S. soldier who spoke German and French, was one of the first to arrive at the Berghof at the end of World War II. His senior officers told him to "get what you want" from the damaged property, so Borch grabbed a toilet seat and shipped it home to New Jersey, where he displayed it in his basement. Bill Panagopulos of Alexander Auctions said, "This was as close to a 'throne' as the dictator would ever get." Borch's son put the "trophy" up for auction; the buyer was not identified.

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Family Values

Joanna Zielinski, 62, of Naples, Florida, was arrested Feb. 11 after stabbing her sister, Laura, 64, multiple times with an EpiPen, according to authorities. Investigators said the two had spent the evening drinking and taking drugs, and Laura fell asleep on the couch. "At some point," said police, "Joanna went crazy and attacked Laura with an EpiPen," because "I'm allergic to drunks," she told officers, and she wanted to sober her sister up. The Smoking Gun reported the EpiPen was prescribed to Joanna, but Laura wasn't affected by the medicine because it wasn't actually injected. Joanna was charged with domestic battery.

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What's Old Is New Again

The Boston Globe reported on Feb. 15 about the newest hipster craze: typewriters. Manual, heavy, clunky "typers." Tom Furrier, the owner of Cambridge Typewriter, Boston's only remaining typewriter repair shop, first noticed the upward sales trend in April 2020. "I was busy beforehand, but COVID raised my business by 40%." While typewriters can't take the place of digital communications devices, they're attractive to young people for creative endeavors that have become popular during the lockdowns: "My customers use it for journaling, poetry, creative writing," Furrier said. "It's all about writing without internet distractions, about getting into a zone." With pandemic restrictions in place, Furrier brings typewriters out onto the sidewalk for customers to inspect, then disinfects them and returns them to the window. Customers "instantly get the typewriter bug," hSend your weird news items with subject line WEIRD NEWS to said.

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